Submit an Academic Petition or Appeal

Petition Letter: Office of the Associate Dean,

As per my Professors recommendation, Dr. Rebecca Wallace through an email conversation with Dr. Kyle Hanniman, I am writing to you today to request to drop POLS382 after the last official drop date has passed. In April of 2019, I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety. I had made an appointment with my family doctor after a hard semester of spending all of my days sleeping, not eating, avoiding socializing, and being granted a large amount of extensions due to my inability to start/complete assignments. I became so anxious that my close friends noticed and became very concerned for my health and well-being. After my diagnosis in the Spring of 2019, I was granted an IN grade for a DEVS seminar that was a requirement for my Degree. I had obtained a grade of A-, until it was time to write my final essay for the course, in which I was over-come with so much anxiety and self-doubt that I didn¿¿t believe in my own ability to maintain my grade. My summer of 2019 consisted of staying indoors, crying profusely to my parents, swallowing nausea, and excessively calling in sick to work until my parents finally made the decision that I quit in order to focus on my mental health. My workplace was with the City of Toronto, where seniority is highly important in regard to job promotions. Letting it go set me back tremendously in terms of potential contacts and career options. When Fall 2019 arrived, I did not listen to my parents and friend¿¿s recommendations that I take the semester off of school in order to spend time at home and try to get better. Fall 2019 was easily the lowest point of my life. The only way I could get out of bed was knowing I had a class to attend, because I refused to have my Professors believe I was a lazy student or that I didn¿¿t care about my work. I attended almost every class and participated in discussions when necessary. During the semester, I went to the grocery store once during Week 1. I became so depressed I resorted to only ordering McDonalds or eating bagels and coffee from Common Ground in the ARC. During home-coming weekend, I became so overwhelmed, anxious, and emotional that I emailed one of my Professors, Dr. Stephen Larin, stating that I was in a mental health crisis and that I was unable to properly function. He kindly granted me extensions on my assignments, spent a large amount of time speaking to me in his office in order to give me confidence regarding my academics, and pushed me to write my mid-term exam, where I happily received a grade of A- after weeks of refusing to write it due to anxiety. Although I received a good great, I did not matter because I had already made the course a Personal Interest Credit due to my anxiety. In early November, my anxiety and depression got so bad that my parents and friends were immensely concerned for my physical and mental being. My best friend forced me to make an appointment with Student Wellness, where they gave me a Short-term accommodation form, taking into account that I was in my final semester at Queen¿¿s and they wanted me to avoid the long process of formally applying for accessibility with QSAS. I also finally decided to take anti-depressants and leave Queen¿¿s. In January of 2020, my IN grade for my DEVS seminar was coming to an end. After months of trying to muster the courage and calm myself enough to write it, the deadline date passed, and I received a D in the course because I had no completed work to show for my final assignment. I have spent January 2020 to August 2020 speaking to therapists about my anxieties with school and COVID-19, 2 of which were mental health councillors from Student Wellness. We have successfully made mindfulness tactics and practice grounding techniques. I also work on controlling my thoughts and calming my body when I feel my anxiety ¿¿crushing my chest¿, my mind racing, or my emotions getting the best of me. For the past year and a half, it has been a rollercoaster of emotions for both my family and me. While my parents are supportive and prioritize me, I realize I have put a lot of emotional strain on them. They constantly deal with my behaviour, as I am either yelling, crying, or avoiding any situation that make me anxious. I often blame them when they can¿¿t understand how I am feeling or make mistakes when it comes to supporting me, and they often take time off work to stay home with me so they can ensure I get out of bed in the morning and eat food throughout the day. I currently take an anti-depressant that works great for me, although my current therapist wonders if there is a better one for me that would allow me to face my anxieties upfront. I try my best to clean, shower, wake up at a decent time, and eat three meals a day. With COVID-19, my previous therapist recommended I leave the house everyday became rather difficult. I personally am not dealing with the anxieties of COVID-19 very well, as I feel the need to stay inside all the time to ensure my parents and grandparents aren't at risk for catching the virus. In regard to my POLS382 course work, my current therapist has not only provided me with mindfulness and grounding techniques, but he also video calls me twice a day for 15-30 minutes to ensure I spend that time doing my schoolwork. My best friend is also very helpful, as she frequently opens a google doc so she can watch me do my schoolwork. If a significant amount of time passes and I have not typed anything, she calls me to work out why I am feeling overwhelmed.

In the end of May and throughout August, I emailed my POLS382 Professor regarding questions about my course assignments. In early August, I emailed her a number of times regarding my potential exam date. After not hearing any responses, I reached out to the POLS Undergraduate Assistant and Undergraduate Chair, where I was informed on August 18 that my Professor no longer works with the University, and that I would be unable to discuss questions regarding my course work. The POLS Undergraduate Chair also let me know that my Professor advises I consider dropping the course at the moment considering the time I have left. While I am so lucky to have an amazing support system, I am very frustrated as to why I am still stuck. I have avoided submitting this appeal for the past three days because I feel like a failure and I really wish I could revert to how I was during the Fall term of 2018. I am very scared at the moment and I do not want my life to be ruined because of a circumstance that I am trying my best to grab hold of and change. I am upset that my mental health has set me back, and I am upset that I do not have the option to ask questions about my course work and readings like my peers did. I feel like I have been trying my best and It isn¿¿t enough. I am so tired of crying, feeling nauseas, and feeling the way that I do. School is the number one priority in my life and all I want is to attend graduate school and obtain a PhD one day. I also have 2 other courses that my professors kindly extended for me that I am trying my best to complete. I know in my heart I can do them successfully. Up until the Winter term of 2019 I have been so proud of my grades, my resume, and my extracurricular activities at Queen¿¿s. I have let so much go because of my depression and anxiety and I would really love the opportunity to rebuild my life for my own self-worth. I hope you consider my appeal request and I also hope you and your department are keeping safe and healthy during this time.

Kind regards,

Serene Nekoui
10177655