Submit an Academic Petition or Appeal

Petition Letter: Dear Associate Academic Dean,

I am writing this letter in support of my appeal to drop CISC 204 (Winter 2021) and receive credit standing for CISC 203(Winter 2021).
I am, and always have been, a student. This is a title defined not so much by one¿¿s enrollment in a school, but rather a love for learning ¿¿ something which I have possessed and been known for since I was very young. My parents have sacrificed and worked hard for the betterment of my brother and I¿¿s future, and so for me it was always evident that it is my job to succeed in school and do whatever I can to help my family. My brother, though older than me, is in many ways the opposite of me. And so somehow, aside from high expectations in school, I from a young age have been expected to be mature, to have an opinion, a solution, to put my family before myself. I am happy to do it, but the pressure it brings is sometimes suffocating.
A couple days before Christmas of 2020, I found little dime bags with white powder in my brother¿¿s room, I am no connoisseur, but I have watched enough TV to know what it was. Disbelief, worry, sadness, anger, sympathy for my parents, more worry, and finally clarity all hit me. The constant lack of money despite working since he was 16 and having no financial responsibility, the sudden mood changes, anger, unpaid debts, missing money, lost presents, all began to make sense. And that is when the guilt hit, how did I not figure it out sooner I stayed with this news and its toxic concoction of emotions brewing inside of me for three days, which has no doubt caused some psychological corrosion. But I wanted to let my family enjoy Christmas. I sat my parents down and told them on the 26th of December. A great ending to a great year. The first month of 2021 was a mentally draining marathon of denial, crying, and blame in my household at the end of which we finally saw some hope. My brother agreed to go to rehab. My family is no stranger to addiction, so I should have known better but I thought everything would be ¿¿ for lack of better word ¿¿ normal, when he got back. Much of his behavior is still the same and he is even more adamant than before about not talking. My household can be best described as a constant state of uncertainty and worry, being prepared for the ground under your feet to disappear at any moment.
Of course, I am aware that every person deals with difficulties and obstacles out of their control, the recent pandemic has shown us how little control we have over our lives. I have never had control over my parent¿¿s arguing, my father¿¿s drinking, an accident in 2018 which left my mom in a hospital bed 4000 kilometers away from me for almost a month, and I do not have control over my brother¿¿s drug addiction. The one thing I have had control over is school. Go to school, learn, get good grades. It gave me purpose and an escape from the problems in my life. Since March of 2020 this too has been drastically changed. Online school has required compromise from everyone, but it has taken a particularly negative toll on me. I no longer have any feeling of control, no way to escape the constant exhaustion of my household. And so, though I am still enrolled in school, recent circumstances have infected my ability to be a student, to enjoy learning, and thus to succeed.
I have also come to the realization that the current program I am enrolled in (Biomedical Computing) is not for me, I enjoy the former half much more than the latter. I am very disappointed in my academic performance this past school year and I know it is not representative of my capabilities. I do not want to bring any more disappointment or financial strain to my family and feel immense pressure in that regard also ¿¿ which I have tried to assist by working part-time as a grocery cashier since March 2020. I plan to change my program this summer and I have reached out to PASS and Queen¿¿s health services for help on ways to cope and deal with stress. It is not easy for me to ask for help, or to admit to failure, I want to be unproblematic and appeasing to those around me ¿¿ my family especially. I dread that my recent failures may ruin my future. I know I can do better. It has been extremely difficult to focus on anything in the past few months, my two biomed related courses, ANAT 380 and MICR 270 have been easier to focus on as I genuinely feel passionate towards the topics, however the other two classes CISC 203 and CISC 204 have proven much more difficult and draining to put effort into. I have managed to do most of the work on the former and should get a passing grade, however I gave up entirely on the latter. I am not sure what the best course of action to salvage my GPA is. However, I know that I will not be passing CISC 204.
That I am a student and love learning will never change ¿¿ it is as intrinsic to my identity as my name or height. I am working on finding out better ways to cope and I eagerly look forward to returning to campus soon. I know I am capable of excellence, and I hope you will give me the chance to show it.

Sincerely,
Nicoleta Moraru