Petition Letter
Dear Dr. Jenn Stephenson,
Through this letter I am petitioning to drop several courses from my transcript. The courses I am petitioning to drop span across two semesters. From my Winter 2023 semester I am petitioning to drop HLTH 305, HLTH 323, HLTH 331, HLTH 334, and PHAR 100. From my Fall 2023 semester I am petitioning to drop FILM 236, FILM 340, FREN 107, LAW 201, and PHIL 259. The extenuating circumstances that I have faced which have led me to submit this request have been significantly life altering. Firstly, I was diagnosed at 15 with anxiety and depression disorders (I have attached a full transcript of my diagnosis from Ontario Shores Centre for Mental Health Sciences). I have struggled with this all my life but have managed to find great success at every level of my education so far. During the 2023 Christmas break I received some life changing news, I was going to be a father. This was something that I was by no means prepared for, or expecting, or frankly that I was ready to deal with. This left me with only a few days to wrap my head around the idea before having to return to school for the winter semester. From the moment I found out I was expecting a child my anxiety/depression and their symptoms increased exponentially. I attempted to return to school from the Christmas break with every intention of powering through how I was feeling and completing my semester of studies. Upon arriving at my house in Kingston I immediately had an enormous panic attack and knew that I had to return to Whitby to speak to my parents as I had been keeping the news to myself thus far. I did so the very next morning. I ended up staying home with my parents for about a few days of the start of the new semester and when I returned to Kingston I immediately went to support services to speak with a counsellor. I was able to set up some accommodations and have a helpful conversation with said counsellor, unfortunately however this would not be enough to overcome my anxiety around the situation. I could never get it out of my head, I couldn’t ever focus on anything. I could not eat, nor sleep, nor read or write schoolwork. I ended up missing many of my first classes due to being so depressed and anxious that I could not get out of bed and when I finally did go the symptoms I experienced in the lecture hall were unbearable. I would not be able to stop sweating and shaking and my ears would be ringing so I could not even hear what was being said and felt as if my heart was going to bounce out of my chest. Frankly it made it impossible for me to retain a single piece of information from a lecture which is extremely uncharacteristic for me given my strong memory. Ultimately as someone with serious anxiety I was not prepared to handle this situation, my failure however had nothing to do with a lack of ability. I know I am capable of completing university level courses and at a high standard at that, these failures are not accurate descriptors of my character and work ethic.
A further example demonstrating the impact of my anxiety from this situation on my ability to function is just how late I am submitting this petition. I have had an anxiety attack every single time I have sat down to write this out because it has forced me to relive everything that has gone wrong and gotten me to this point which I am not very proud of nor content with. My education is extremely important to me not just for future employment but for my personal fulfilment as well and I really hope that through this letter you will see that I deserve to still have the opportunity to complete my studies despite my setbacks.
When I first told my parents the news that I was expecting a child the very first thing that was said to me was that I would lose all of their support if I did not complete my degree. This left me in such a state of panic and left me feeling like I had virtually no options. I did not feel capable of completing my studies during the Winter 2023 semester but had to at least attempt because if I did not I would lose financial support I was counting on to keep myself and my soon to be born son alive. This revelation that I would lose financial support gave me so much anxiety that I spent more time worrying about what would happen than anything else. I could not drop my classes either due to the anxiety of the message my parents gave me that they would not support me if I did not finish school. I did not want to return to school for the winter semester but I did because of what they said. I knew all too well that I was not in a place where I could possibly be successful and desperately wanted to delay my studies while I sorted some things out such as generating some income and working on my mental health and accepting my new situation. Ultimately that was not an option for me and left me in a position where I was anxious about everything and not getting anything done. This was the sole reason that I did not apply to drop my courses during the semester. I had so much anxiety about facing my parents and about losing their support both financial and emotional that I could not possibly bring myself to drop my courses.
After opening up to my parents about failing an entire semester they were relatively understanding however their message was still the exact same and would not accept that I was not prepared to take on the stress of university courses with everything else going on. I had since moved back to whitby to live with my son and had discussions with academic advisors as well as someone from Queens support services about my options going forward. The best plan that we were able to collectively come up with was that I would take all online courses for a semester so that I would not have to return to Kingston and could take care of my son. Things did not end up going as planned between his mother and I in terms of a division of labour. I truly became his sole care-giver for the first four months of his life (July-October) which left me drained and with very little free time to work on courses. Even when I finally did have the time I would be so exhausted and need to relax so I would be ready when my son would need me again. Essentially in the first couple months of the Fall 2023 semester I was taking on way too big of a load. I was trying to raise a baby by myself, complete five university courses, and overcome all the anxiety I was experiencing both regarding school and all the worries that come with being a parent. I frankly was much quicker to give up in the Fall 2023 semester because it was evident right away that I would not be able to succeed. I am not even positive that I ever opened all of my courses on OnQ because of how much stress I was under. I still however could not drop my courses because if I did so I would lose my parents support which had never been more important given that my son had arrived and I was very very quickly running out of money in my accounts to fall back on.
My plan going forward firstly involves officially taking a leave of absence from my studies to give me the opportunity to fully assess my options as well as to find a job to support myself and my son in the meantime. I plan on having lots of discussion with my sons mother to see if relocating to Kingston is something that is on the table for us but given that I cannot bear the mental burden of living in a city hours away from my child it is more probable that I would pursue the route of transferring credits and beginning at a university closer to home. I have been doing research into credit transfer to the Trent Durham campus as my leading contender where I would to complete my undergrad and then teachers college. Overall, I have clearly taken many steps away from the life I want to live and feel as though I should be living and desperately hope that you can see I am committed to not giving up and with your grace I will have the opportunity to start putting my life back together starting by completing an undergraduate degree.
Signed,
Tim O’Neill
Through this letter I am petitioning to drop several courses from my transcript. The courses I am petitioning to drop span across two semesters. From my Winter 2023 semester I am petitioning to drop HLTH 305, HLTH 323, HLTH 331, HLTH 334, and PHAR 100. From my Fall 2023 semester I am petitioning to drop FILM 236, FILM 340, FREN 107, LAW 201, and PHIL 259. The extenuating circumstances that I have faced which have led me to submit this request have been significantly life altering. Firstly, I was diagnosed at 15 with anxiety and depression disorders (I have attached a full transcript of my diagnosis from Ontario Shores Centre for Mental Health Sciences). I have struggled with this all my life but have managed to find great success at every level of my education so far. During the 2023 Christmas break I received some life changing news, I was going to be a father. This was something that I was by no means prepared for, or expecting, or frankly that I was ready to deal with. This left me with only a few days to wrap my head around the idea before having to return to school for the winter semester. From the moment I found out I was expecting a child my anxiety/depression and their symptoms increased exponentially. I attempted to return to school from the Christmas break with every intention of powering through how I was feeling and completing my semester of studies. Upon arriving at my house in Kingston I immediately had an enormous panic attack and knew that I had to return to Whitby to speak to my parents as I had been keeping the news to myself thus far. I did so the very next morning. I ended up staying home with my parents for about a few days of the start of the new semester and when I returned to Kingston I immediately went to support services to speak with a counsellor. I was able to set up some accommodations and have a helpful conversation with said counsellor, unfortunately however this would not be enough to overcome my anxiety around the situation. I could never get it out of my head, I couldn’t ever focus on anything. I could not eat, nor sleep, nor read or write schoolwork. I ended up missing many of my first classes due to being so depressed and anxious that I could not get out of bed and when I finally did go the symptoms I experienced in the lecture hall were unbearable. I would not be able to stop sweating and shaking and my ears would be ringing so I could not even hear what was being said and felt as if my heart was going to bounce out of my chest. Frankly it made it impossible for me to retain a single piece of information from a lecture which is extremely uncharacteristic for me given my strong memory. Ultimately as someone with serious anxiety I was not prepared to handle this situation, my failure however had nothing to do with a lack of ability. I know I am capable of completing university level courses and at a high standard at that, these failures are not accurate descriptors of my character and work ethic.
A further example demonstrating the impact of my anxiety from this situation on my ability to function is just how late I am submitting this petition. I have had an anxiety attack every single time I have sat down to write this out because it has forced me to relive everything that has gone wrong and gotten me to this point which I am not very proud of nor content with. My education is extremely important to me not just for future employment but for my personal fulfilment as well and I really hope that through this letter you will see that I deserve to still have the opportunity to complete my studies despite my setbacks.
When I first told my parents the news that I was expecting a child the very first thing that was said to me was that I would lose all of their support if I did not complete my degree. This left me in such a state of panic and left me feeling like I had virtually no options. I did not feel capable of completing my studies during the Winter 2023 semester but had to at least attempt because if I did not I would lose financial support I was counting on to keep myself and my soon to be born son alive. This revelation that I would lose financial support gave me so much anxiety that I spent more time worrying about what would happen than anything else. I could not drop my classes either due to the anxiety of the message my parents gave me that they would not support me if I did not finish school. I did not want to return to school for the winter semester but I did because of what they said. I knew all too well that I was not in a place where I could possibly be successful and desperately wanted to delay my studies while I sorted some things out such as generating some income and working on my mental health and accepting my new situation. Ultimately that was not an option for me and left me in a position where I was anxious about everything and not getting anything done. This was the sole reason that I did not apply to drop my courses during the semester. I had so much anxiety about facing my parents and about losing their support both financial and emotional that I could not possibly bring myself to drop my courses.
After opening up to my parents about failing an entire semester they were relatively understanding however their message was still the exact same and would not accept that I was not prepared to take on the stress of university courses with everything else going on. I had since moved back to whitby to live with my son and had discussions with academic advisors as well as someone from Queens support services about my options going forward. The best plan that we were able to collectively come up with was that I would take all online courses for a semester so that I would not have to return to Kingston and could take care of my son. Things did not end up going as planned between his mother and I in terms of a division of labour. I truly became his sole care-giver for the first four months of his life (July-October) which left me drained and with very little free time to work on courses. Even when I finally did have the time I would be so exhausted and need to relax so I would be ready when my son would need me again. Essentially in the first couple months of the Fall 2023 semester I was taking on way too big of a load. I was trying to raise a baby by myself, complete five university courses, and overcome all the anxiety I was experiencing both regarding school and all the worries that come with being a parent. I frankly was much quicker to give up in the Fall 2023 semester because it was evident right away that I would not be able to succeed. I am not even positive that I ever opened all of my courses on OnQ because of how much stress I was under. I still however could not drop my courses because if I did so I would lose my parents support which had never been more important given that my son had arrived and I was very very quickly running out of money in my accounts to fall back on.
My plan going forward firstly involves officially taking a leave of absence from my studies to give me the opportunity to fully assess my options as well as to find a job to support myself and my son in the meantime. I plan on having lots of discussion with my sons mother to see if relocating to Kingston is something that is on the table for us but given that I cannot bear the mental burden of living in a city hours away from my child it is more probable that I would pursue the route of transferring credits and beginning at a university closer to home. I have been doing research into credit transfer to the Trent Durham campus as my leading contender where I would to complete my undergrad and then teachers college. Overall, I have clearly taken many steps away from the life I want to live and feel as though I should be living and desperately hope that you can see I am committed to not giving up and with your grace I will have the opportunity to start putting my life back together starting by completing an undergraduate degree.
Signed,
Tim O’Neill