Petition Letter
Dear Associate Dean,
I am appealing to waive the 21 day/1 term deadline to further drop Biol 205, Chem 211, Chem 212, and math 121A (Fall, 2013) and also appealing to drop Math 231 (Fall, 2016).
During my first year at Queen's University in 2012, I entered a very toxic and abusive relationship. This relationship, which was both physically and emotionally abusive, carried on for far too long and had a bold impact on my mental health. I felt emotionally and mentally strained; I could not concentrate on my studies because I was easily discouraged, and experienced suicidal thoughts which paralyzed me in many of my courses during that time period. I also made terrible decisions to self-harm. This eventually led me to make the decision to leave Queen's University mid-semester during my second year in fall 2013 without writing my final exams. Furthermore, during that same time period, I was trying to deal with the passing of my best friend. I felt hopeless, saddened, and stressed. I felt that it was safer and the best decision for me to be as close as possible to my family seeing as I had lost a lot of my close friends as a result of the abusive relationship since I did not want to get out of bed, let alone talk to anyone. These grades that I achieved during fall 2013 are not due to a lack of effort and hard work but as a result of my very unhealthy mental state. While I was enrolled in these courses, I encountered numerous break downs, panic attacks, and depressing thoughts. For these reasons, I was not in the right mental state to think clearly and even consider to appeal these courses within the one term deadline. After leaving Queen's University, approximately one year later, the relationship ended. A few months following the break up, I decided to give Queen's University another chance. I came back in fall of 2015 and decided to take a smaller course load in order to ease myself back into the student life without overwhelming myself and without reminding myself of what happened previously. I found that I still struggled a little bit with anxiety and depression but I was able to successfully complete the school year. In fall 2016, my panic attacks were back at large, I was struggling to get out of bed and to find motivation to do absolutely anything; I was continuously drowning in sadness. I would have moments where I would be distracted enough by my friends and family to feel better but they only lasted for a brief moment. In the face of crippling stress and anxiety, I found it very difficult to concentrate on school work and during many of my evaluations. My breakdowns and anxiety attacks would take up most of the day, it was very exhausting mentally. When I would attempt to study for an assessment, I simply couldn't focus and was too drained to put the effort in. This resulted in a very poor grade in math 231 in fall 2016. The grades achieved in these courses that I have requested to drop are not an accurate reflection of my actual capabilities. Consequently, if possible, I would like to request that the courses do not show on my transcript at all, this includes showing as a DR or CR. This is because I feel that the break I took from Queen's University in 2013 as a result of my depression and anxiety will already serve as a huge hurdle in my future ventures and I would like to minimize the effect my mental issues will have in my future as much as possible since I strongly believe that these grades do not reflect my full potential.
Since receiving my grades at the end of the fall semester in 2016, I was determined to find a way to change my life for good and to fix whatever it is that was wrong with me. The first step I took was to let go of social boundaries and embarrassment, and finally speak to my doctor about my issues. After speaking to my doctor about my symptoms and my past experiences, my doctor prescribed an anti-depressant for me. It took a while to gain up the courage to actually start consuming the pills, but I eventually was able to. Unfortunately, this was not till right before exams when I realized I could not put this off any longer. However, I am afraid that the pills did not have a positive impact on me since I still experience anxiety attacks. After doing some research, I found that the pills take at least a month of consumption until it has any noticeable effect. I plan to continue taking the pills and also to start having regular appointments with my doctor when needed once I move back for the summer. I have also opened up to a few people about my struggles that I believe can be a great support system for me for when I am experiencing any negative thoughts or suspect an attack or breakdown in the near future. Furthermore, I plan to retake the courses in which I performed poorly and are also important to my degree, such as math 231. I also plan to schedule a weekly tutor so that I can set internal deadlines to review coursework before my tutor sessions in an attempt to not only fight my struggles and keep up with my work but also to maintain interest and motivation. I have also taken the time to make a visual plan of how I would like my next few years at Queen's to unroll. I have done this in order to remind myself of what is important to me, especially when my mind is clouded with negativity and I find it hard to concentrate.
I am appealing to waive the 21 day/1 term deadline to further drop Biol 205, Chem 211, Chem 212, and math 121A (Fall, 2013) and also appealing to drop Math 231 (Fall, 2016).
During my first year at Queen's University in 2012, I entered a very toxic and abusive relationship. This relationship, which was both physically and emotionally abusive, carried on for far too long and had a bold impact on my mental health. I felt emotionally and mentally strained; I could not concentrate on my studies because I was easily discouraged, and experienced suicidal thoughts which paralyzed me in many of my courses during that time period. I also made terrible decisions to self-harm. This eventually led me to make the decision to leave Queen's University mid-semester during my second year in fall 2013 without writing my final exams. Furthermore, during that same time period, I was trying to deal with the passing of my best friend. I felt hopeless, saddened, and stressed. I felt that it was safer and the best decision for me to be as close as possible to my family seeing as I had lost a lot of my close friends as a result of the abusive relationship since I did not want to get out of bed, let alone talk to anyone. These grades that I achieved during fall 2013 are not due to a lack of effort and hard work but as a result of my very unhealthy mental state. While I was enrolled in these courses, I encountered numerous break downs, panic attacks, and depressing thoughts. For these reasons, I was not in the right mental state to think clearly and even consider to appeal these courses within the one term deadline. After leaving Queen's University, approximately one year later, the relationship ended. A few months following the break up, I decided to give Queen's University another chance. I came back in fall of 2015 and decided to take a smaller course load in order to ease myself back into the student life without overwhelming myself and without reminding myself of what happened previously. I found that I still struggled a little bit with anxiety and depression but I was able to successfully complete the school year. In fall 2016, my panic attacks were back at large, I was struggling to get out of bed and to find motivation to do absolutely anything; I was continuously drowning in sadness. I would have moments where I would be distracted enough by my friends and family to feel better but they only lasted for a brief moment. In the face of crippling stress and anxiety, I found it very difficult to concentrate on school work and during many of my evaluations. My breakdowns and anxiety attacks would take up most of the day, it was very exhausting mentally. When I would attempt to study for an assessment, I simply couldn't focus and was too drained to put the effort in. This resulted in a very poor grade in math 231 in fall 2016. The grades achieved in these courses that I have requested to drop are not an accurate reflection of my actual capabilities. Consequently, if possible, I would like to request that the courses do not show on my transcript at all, this includes showing as a DR or CR. This is because I feel that the break I took from Queen's University in 2013 as a result of my depression and anxiety will already serve as a huge hurdle in my future ventures and I would like to minimize the effect my mental issues will have in my future as much as possible since I strongly believe that these grades do not reflect my full potential.
Since receiving my grades at the end of the fall semester in 2016, I was determined to find a way to change my life for good and to fix whatever it is that was wrong with me. The first step I took was to let go of social boundaries and embarrassment, and finally speak to my doctor about my issues. After speaking to my doctor about my symptoms and my past experiences, my doctor prescribed an anti-depressant for me. It took a while to gain up the courage to actually start consuming the pills, but I eventually was able to. Unfortunately, this was not till right before exams when I realized I could not put this off any longer. However, I am afraid that the pills did not have a positive impact on me since I still experience anxiety attacks. After doing some research, I found that the pills take at least a month of consumption until it has any noticeable effect. I plan to continue taking the pills and also to start having regular appointments with my doctor when needed once I move back for the summer. I have also opened up to a few people about my struggles that I believe can be a great support system for me for when I am experiencing any negative thoughts or suspect an attack or breakdown in the near future. Furthermore, I plan to retake the courses in which I performed poorly and are also important to my degree, such as math 231. I also plan to schedule a weekly tutor so that I can set internal deadlines to review coursework before my tutor sessions in an attempt to not only fight my struggles and keep up with my work but also to maintain interest and motivation. I have also taken the time to make a visual plan of how I would like my next few years at Queen's to unroll. I have done this in order to remind myself of what is important to me, especially when my mind is clouded with negativity and I find it hard to concentrate.