Submit an Academic Petition or Appeal

Petition Letter: I thank you in advance for considering my academic appeal for late drop (CLST205, DRAM200, SOCY211, RELS131) and for credit standing (SOCY275).

I will be asking for the appeal on the basis that I was experiencing a mental health breakdown which overtook my life. It was provoked by a mentally and emotionally abusive relationship, which I felt I was unable to leave in first and second year of university, on top of pre-existing mental health struggles. I am asking for the appeal deadline to be extended as I was unable to process my circumstances at the time and it has taken me time to feel stable enough to sit and detail my experience as it is still difficult the reflect upon.

Through high school I had struggled with social and generalized anxiety disorder. I had sought counselling for this and was given strategies to push through anxiety attacks and overcome negative thinking. I was able to cope with this and graduated with honours and high skills major. While it did interfere with my social relationships, I was able to succeed in academically. My time at Queen¿¿s University was successful in my first year which I spent at the Bader International Study Center in England, both academically and for the overall enrichment of my life. I had always dreamed of living in England, the BISC provided a very supportive environment for me to explore another culture while I was living on my own for the first time.

In first year at the castle I started a relationship with someone and it became quite serious very fast. We signed a lease for a house in Kingston and moved in together in the summer of 2015 when we returned from our year abroad. He became very controlling of my life from then on. If I didn¿¿t come home within half hour of being done work or a class, he would call me relentlessly until I came home or if I didn¿¿t have a key with me he would lock me out of the house only letting me back in when I had apologized to him profusely. If I had plans with friends, he would sometimes contact them directly to say I had too much going on and that they were a distraction to me. After which my friends would cancel the plans without giving me a reason. He monitored my social media accounts and deleted or blocked anyone he didn¿¿t know or approve of me having contact with, including friends that I had had since my childhood. In the summer after second year, he was driving me to my mother¿¿s surprise 50th birthday in my home town. On the way he decided that I wasn¿¿t grateful enough for him taking the time to drive me there and pulled off the highway to a gas station and told me to get out, he drove away and only coming back 30 minutes later and letting me back in once I had apologized to him for the inconvenience. While this is not an exhaustive list, I hope it gives an idea.
Over the two years we were together his constant gas lighting and manipulation made me questions every aspect of my life. I wasn¿¿t sure if anyone in my life was there for me, if I would be able to survive without him, or if I was worthy of success. He made it very clear to me that I was lucky he found me because he was the only person who cloud love me in the state I was in and that I needed his help to become a better person. In hindsight, I can see clearly that none of his behaviour was out of love but at the time I felt lucky that someone cared enough to take action in my life. I never believed I would be someone who would allow someone to abuse me whether is was verbally, psychologically, or physically. That is part of the major reason I didn¿¿t believe it was even happening to me while I was in the midst of it all.

In this time my mental health deteriorated. I was alienated from my family and friends, and felt that I didn¿¿t have anyone to reach out to for help. It was an extremely dark time for me. In my second year of university I had varying success in my courses, I tried my very best through each. I was able to succeed in some but overall my head was clouded over and I struggled to excel in my courework .I sought counselling from the Queens mental health services and met with someone regularly to work through my struggles with the situation. In the summer my counsellor and I decided to try Cognitive Behavioural Therapy as my mental state has been so altered, traditional counselling was not helping me out of my mind set. This process did help me form a clearer idea of the direction I wanted to take my life and the steps I would need to take in order to get there. Despite this, it came to a head in the summer when I tried to take the religion course and I couldn¿¿t physically read. My mental state was so compromised that my brain couldn¿¿t compute words and when it came time to study I would go into intense panic attacks that could last up to an hour, leaving me without any energy or becoming physically sick. I tried my absolute best to do the course but as I became extremely suicidal, I needed to step away from school.

I decided to move back to England to escape the situation I was in as a sort of shock therapy. Once there was an ocean between us I was able to end the relationship. He did attempt to blackmail me into coming home by contacting my family and friends, telling them I was in serious danger and lying to them. Thankfully, I was able to stay and it gave me time to reset and have a taste of the life I would like to someday live. I worked in a very fulfilling job, made amazing friendships and connections. I attended meetings for women of mentally abusive relationships and was able to talk through what I had experienced and made sense of it. I moved home to Canada in August of 2018 and have been working to save money to go back to school. I am living with my family who are a strong support system to me through the transition. I saw a counsellor for the first months of coming back to map out a plan for myself in terms of achieving my long term life goal in smaller, tangible chunks. ¿¿
I now feel ready and able to return to school with tools in hand to be a successful student. I have saved enough money to cover more than a year¿¿s tuition so finances will not be a stressor for me. I will continue to live with my family in a nearby town, maintaining a home base with a strong support system for myself. I have decided to pursue a career in communications, I was able to make relationships in London with people who have careers in that field and were eager to help me find jobs with sponsorship opportunities. This will only be possible if I focus on my academics and complete my education. I hope that I will be given the opportunity to do so and that my appeal will be accepted.

Thank you,
Noelle Carroll