Submit an Academic Petition or Appeal

Petition Letter: Dear Associate Dean,

I am writing to appeal a number of courses, due to a combination of the impact of my mental illnesses and other uncontrollable factors since the Winter 2016 semester, as follows:

For LATE WITHDRAWAL
¿¿ HIST 400-003 2019 Winter
¿¿ HIST 400-004 2019 Winter
¿¿ HIST 499 2018 Winter
¿¿ HIST 447 2017 Fall
¿¿ HIST 206 2016 Winter

For AEGROTAT
¿¿ LING 330 2017 Fall
¿¿ LING 340 2016 Winter
¿¿ HIST 318 2015-16 FW

For extending INCOMPLETE
¿¿ LING 350 2018 Fall
¿¿ HIST 439 2018 Fall

Below I will outline the impact of my mental health and other adverse circumstances on my academic performance during each of the relevant terms.

Winter 2016
My mental health became an issue for the first time in my undergraduate career in Winter 2016, initially because of an unhealthy relationship. I began to blame everything on myself, as this first-time intimate relationship of mine became a burden on both my mental and physical health. I did not reach out to any friend or family for help, because sharing personal, emotional issues like such had been utterly unfamiliar to me in my family and the environment I grew up with in China. Meanwhile, I did not attempt to self-help either, since I was ashamed of my situation and I was unaware of any resources available to me. (In fact, my first-year study at the BISC campus as an international student negatively affected my subsequent study permit application for second-year, resulting in a very late approval that caused me to miss the first two weeks of class and also the NEWTS orientation, which would have introduced me to various resources on campus. This negative impact of studying at the BISC for first-year program on international students can be confirmed by Immigration Advisors at the QUIC).

In HIST 206, my ability to attend class worsened as the semester went on, and so did my grades. When I started doing poorly on assignments, I was unable to advocate for myself (had the grading been unfair) or to speak to TAs about how to improve my performance, because I believed that I deserved these consequences as a result of dating. By the end of the term, I was so unwell that I was not attending classes anymore. I became so discouraged that I did not submit the final assignment or write the final exam at all. On grounds of my impaired functioning and the circumstances that prevented me from seeking help, I would like to appeal for LATE WITHDRAWAL from this course.

Meanwhile, as my mental health worsened, I tried to continue applying myself in my courses. Yet I was not able to complete the last couple of assignments (including final take-home exam) towards the end of HIST and the take-home exam for LING. At that time, I believed that it was all my own fault and I deserved whatever bad thing that happened to me. I never considered the option of speaking to my professors either, for I was afraid of being judged as seeking excuses and cheating for grades. Because I had finished the majority of assessments for both of these two courses (and did well in what I did complete), I would like to appeal for AEGROTAT in them.

I was able to do well in two other Winter 2016 courses (JAPN 200 and LING 100) because they were both full year courses, and that I was already doing very well in them by the time my mental health affected me. There was such a large number and high frequency of assignments, and due to my comfort with the material, the episodes of illness did not affect my overall grades in those courses.

2016-2017 academic year: On Exchange in Japan
During this year, due to a relationship that turned physically and psychologically abusive, I began experiencing escalating stress, withdrawing from my social circles, and eventually, engaging in self-harm. Still, I did not share the details of my relationship with anyone, friends, host family or family, and increasingly I isolated myself. In the process, my academics continued to suffer like before, and I kept having trouble concentrating on and following through with coursework in the face of mental distress and relationship issues. I ended up constantly ¿¿disappearing¿ from class and failing to submit assignments, without ever speaking to instructors or any school staff for help or consultation.

In fact, my ongoing mental illnesses and my deep discomfort with confronting memories from my time in Japan have prevented me from taking proper actions in obtaining transfer credits by far.

Fall 2017
After returning to Kingston, I became suicidal around halfway through the term, as the ongoing abusive relationship escalated. For the first time, I accessed crisis support, initially in the community and then at Student Wellness Services, where I started receiving mental health counselling from a mental health nurse. However, the counselling was of limited impact and I continued to be manipulated by the relationship. No diagnosis was sought or provided at this point, and because I kept avoiding the topic of my academics in counselling out of shame, I did not receive any support in this regard.

Towards the end of the term, I was no longer able to keep up with completing assignments. Despite having overcome my suicidal episodes, I was so unwell and dysfunctional due to the still ongoing relationship. I was unable to write the final take-home exam for LING 330. As LING 330 was taught by same instructor as LING 340 from 2016, I was even more afraid to talk to the instructor and explain myself. Because I had completed all the components of assessment prior to the final exam, I would therefore like to appeal for AEGROTAT in this course.

In HIST447, there was only one assignment in the early part of the term, which I completed. I was not well enough to finish the remaining two assignments later in the term, even though I managed to keep attending classes. I would therefore like to appeal for LATE WITHDRAWAL from this course.

Winter 2018
By Winter 2018, I was referred to and started participating in a group therapy through Counselling Services, in addition to working with the mental health nurse, both of which were somewhat helpful in keeping me trying for more.

My mental health was still very unstable during the term, but I was able to do well in two courses (LING 320 & LATN 110). Because these courses had mostly only quizzes and exams as assessments, they were not time-consuming to me and I was still able to do well overall despite fluctuations in health condition. In HIST 499, however, having fewer and larger assignments was challenging for me, as they became overwhelming and difficult to follow through whenever my mental health suffered, and I never managed to communicate with the instructor either (this difficulty was still not addressed). As a result, I was unable to finish the majority of assessments for this course, and I would like to appeal for LATE WITHDRAWAL from HIST 499.

Fall 2018
In Fall 2018, in addition to my ongoing, undiagnosed mental health issues, various related physical symptoms began to interfere with my ability to engage in academics. Under the persuasion of friends, for the first time, I decided to drop one course prior to the deadline in order to try and manage my remaining courses. Nevertheless, my symptoms eventually prevented me from attending classes consistently and being able to complete assignments later in the term. Towards the end of the term, I started to receive short-term academic accommodations, which allowed me to be granted Incompletes in HIST 447 and LING 350 (unofficially at professor¿¿s discretion), while I was waiting to receive a diagnosis in order to register with QSAS.

I hope to appeal for an extension of my INCOMPLETE for both HIST 439 and LING 350. Please see below for the reasons why I have been unable to follow up on these two courses in time.

Winter 2019
In early January 2019, I received a diagnosis and started to receive medical treatment related to my mental health conditions. The diagnosis finally allowed me to register for ongoing academic accommodation through QSAS at the beginning of February. Due to the untimely manner in which I obtained my accommodations (too late for mid-term exam), the terrible communication I received from my QSAS advisor at the time, and my worsening conditions, I was unable benefit from the accommodations. Although I began receiving support from more professionals, my frustration with QSAS and the lack of effective communication among different networks prevented me from trusting those who helped me. Even after dropping two courses consecutively, my suffering kept affecting me to the extent that I became unable to attend any class at all for the second half of term, in addition to avoiding contact with my family and friends. I also had a couple of suicidal episodes again because of the burden I felt out of my duty to my parents and their money, from peer pressure, and from the escalating isolation I created for myself. It was not until the end of this semester that I began to open up fully with health care professionals about the extent of difficulty I had been experiencing in all aspects of my life, especially in academics.

I would like to appeal for LATE WITHDRAWAL from both HIST 400 courses of this semester.

Summer 2019 till the present
Over the summer, I dedicated my time to recovery by continuing to receive a combination of medication, psychiatry, counseling, and occupational therapy support, with higher frequency and intensity. Instead of dealing with the IN courses from Fall 2019 or the appeal application itself, I chose to temporarily immerse myself in artistic activities and 100-level coursework, in an attempt to look forward and regain some confidence in myself. Although another suicidal episode happened in July, my conditions have been steadily improving, as a result of my improved attitude towards the care I am receiving, and also partly due to my parents¿¿ company since the end of June.

Currently, with proper QSAS accommodations in place (and a change in my advisor) and a more effective and stable support network, including not only health care professionals but also family and friends, I have been making steady progress in meeting the demands of daily life and academic work so far in this semester. Having largely overcome the trauma of my past relationships, I am now able to devote time and energy to myself. Moreover, there has been important reconciliation and healing taking place between my parents and me, and I am confident that this will help me in the long run. Academically, in order to motivate myself, I have been working on courses that serve as prerequisites for graduate programs I am considering. I have also switched from a HIST major to a LING major, in order to reach graduation faster. After filing this appeal application, I plan to complete the procedures for transferring my course credits from Japan by the end of this semester, so that I can graduate in time for next Spring ¿¿ regardless of the prospect of my graduate school application, graduating is now my top priority.

By this appeal application, I hope I could be granted the opportunity to have my academic record adjusted, so that it accurately and justly reflects my ability as a student despite the uncontrollable circumstances that happened to me over the years, and thereby helps me graduate in time. I acknowledge that what already happened cannot be easily erased; yet, I believe everyone deserves a second chance, even in this age of impersonal records. Therefore, I beg for your understanding that I truly need to appeal for late withdrawal from the above history courses especially, because the History Department has not been offering any of them a second time, even though I have consistently aimed for re-taking the courses.

I apologize for the tremendous delay in my appeal for all the above-mentioned courses. I have not been able to submit any appeals due to the ongoing nature of my various conditions, but I believe I have now recovered sufficiently to give more steady performance from this point. Now that I have gained the courage to face my own history and reality, I can finally move on from my past instead of drowning in shame and guilt. I would truly appreciate your favourable consideration for my requests.

Sincerely,

Maria Bingjie Xu