Petition Letter
I am appealing to the faculty to replace my C grade in the course WRIT 120 with a CR standing.
My grade in this course reflects my ongoing struggles caused by ADHD, compounded by the intense anxiety I was experiencing due to my approaching graduation and my grandfather's recent death. I will address each of these circumstances and elaborate on their effect on my performance.
I received a diagnosis of ADHD in April of 2021 from a Queen's student wellness doctor. I reached out because I was overwhelmed and feeling burnout from completing my classwork and meeting my basic survival needs, such as cooking and cleaning. My ADHD affects me in countless ways, which, even with a new medication, I am just now starting to understand and learn to counter.
Initiating tasks that I am not confident in my ability to complete successfully is highly daunting to me. I find myself trapped in the planning stage when I receive assignments I do not feel knowledgeable or skilled in. My ADHD causes me to hyper-fixate on having a perfect idea or outline before putting a single word on paper. Furthermore, I find it very difficult to focus on tasks for long periods, particularly those that require me to sit still. As such, I find it very difficult to keep up with readings, long lectures, and writing lengthy papers on topics I am not especially passionate about. I sometimes work on a single ten-page reading for three to five hours, while longer ones can take me an entire day. These issues often trap me in a vicious cycle of anxiety as I get closer and closer to the deadline and feel even less able to produce a high-quality product because of the increasing time restraints. Finally, my ADHD affects my memory, and I frequently make mental notes that I quickly forget. As such, I am prone to missing details in assignment instructions and deadlines when I do not receive constant visible reminders from myself or others.
Although the prescription I received with my diagnosis has helped improve my ability to initiate tasks and focus for longer periods, it has not fixed my confidence nor dramatically reduced how long it takes me to read and write. Before my diagnosis, I relied on the surge of energy brought on by doing assignments at the last minute. However, understanding why I found certain things so difficult created a new consciousness of my faults and has forced me to rebuild my coping mechanisms and strategies completely. Additionally, the feeling of reliance on medication and academic accommodations has shaken my confidence in my intelligence, self-discipline, and self-worth, contributing further to the anxiety I feel when tackling intimidating tasks.
My approaching graduation also brought a host of new anxieties that contributed to the vicious cycle of distraction, procrastination, and anxiety I was experiencing. The end of my student career carried with it a transition that I did not feel prepared for, leading to new intense pressures right as WRIT 120 was beginning.
In January of 2022, I lost my grandfather after a long struggle with several illnesses that caused him to enter the ICU around nine times over two years. He lived in Colombia, and I could not visit throughout the entire time he battled his health nor for his funeral. My grieving process was lonely and challenging. I was away from my family in Colombia, and I had refused time off from school in a misguided attempt to prove to myself that I didn't need even more accommodations. I feel this stunted my ability to process my loss and grieve properly, creating a constant distraction that fed my ADHD even more than usual.
Unfortunately, WRIT 120's timing and material coincided with the poorest period of my mental health this past summer. My other classes began at the beginning of the summer when graduation was more distant, and I did not yet have a full-time job. However, by the time WRIT 120 began, I was severely struggling to balance my schoolwork and professional work while entering the peak of my anxiety. My routine, which normally helped me to stay on top of my schoolwork, was disrupted by moving cities and receiving new responsibilities. Although my writing skills adequately carried me through my politics courses, I decided to take WRIT 120 because I needed to improve my writing skills. My reasoning for taking the class became a source of procrastination, as I felt intimidated by the possibility of producing poor writing and felt more comfortable in my other, more familiar courses and professional work. Additionally, WRIT 120 lasted only six weeks, meaning there were many more tightly packed deadlines, which I had difficulty keeping track of. Ultimately, I spiralled in this course and felt utterly out of my depth. It became a constant source of added anxiety, which my ADHD caused me to jump between unconsciously avoiding and desperately trying to repair.
Ultimately, I feel that my performance in WRIT 120 is not a reflection of my true academic abilities but of a set of circumstances beyond my control that worsened my mental health. Since completing the course, I have created a new daily routine that significantly reduces the negative effects of my ADHD by minimizing uncertainty and distractions. I have also begun seeking therapy, as I need to avoid the unmanageable mental spiral I faced this past summer.
My grade in this course reflects my ongoing struggles caused by ADHD, compounded by the intense anxiety I was experiencing due to my approaching graduation and my grandfather's recent death. I will address each of these circumstances and elaborate on their effect on my performance.
I received a diagnosis of ADHD in April of 2021 from a Queen's student wellness doctor. I reached out because I was overwhelmed and feeling burnout from completing my classwork and meeting my basic survival needs, such as cooking and cleaning. My ADHD affects me in countless ways, which, even with a new medication, I am just now starting to understand and learn to counter.
Initiating tasks that I am not confident in my ability to complete successfully is highly daunting to me. I find myself trapped in the planning stage when I receive assignments I do not feel knowledgeable or skilled in. My ADHD causes me to hyper-fixate on having a perfect idea or outline before putting a single word on paper. Furthermore, I find it very difficult to focus on tasks for long periods, particularly those that require me to sit still. As such, I find it very difficult to keep up with readings, long lectures, and writing lengthy papers on topics I am not especially passionate about. I sometimes work on a single ten-page reading for three to five hours, while longer ones can take me an entire day. These issues often trap me in a vicious cycle of anxiety as I get closer and closer to the deadline and feel even less able to produce a high-quality product because of the increasing time restraints. Finally, my ADHD affects my memory, and I frequently make mental notes that I quickly forget. As such, I am prone to missing details in assignment instructions and deadlines when I do not receive constant visible reminders from myself or others.
Although the prescription I received with my diagnosis has helped improve my ability to initiate tasks and focus for longer periods, it has not fixed my confidence nor dramatically reduced how long it takes me to read and write. Before my diagnosis, I relied on the surge of energy brought on by doing assignments at the last minute. However, understanding why I found certain things so difficult created a new consciousness of my faults and has forced me to rebuild my coping mechanisms and strategies completely. Additionally, the feeling of reliance on medication and academic accommodations has shaken my confidence in my intelligence, self-discipline, and self-worth, contributing further to the anxiety I feel when tackling intimidating tasks.
My approaching graduation also brought a host of new anxieties that contributed to the vicious cycle of distraction, procrastination, and anxiety I was experiencing. The end of my student career carried with it a transition that I did not feel prepared for, leading to new intense pressures right as WRIT 120 was beginning.
In January of 2022, I lost my grandfather after a long struggle with several illnesses that caused him to enter the ICU around nine times over two years. He lived in Colombia, and I could not visit throughout the entire time he battled his health nor for his funeral. My grieving process was lonely and challenging. I was away from my family in Colombia, and I had refused time off from school in a misguided attempt to prove to myself that I didn't need even more accommodations. I feel this stunted my ability to process my loss and grieve properly, creating a constant distraction that fed my ADHD even more than usual.
Unfortunately, WRIT 120's timing and material coincided with the poorest period of my mental health this past summer. My other classes began at the beginning of the summer when graduation was more distant, and I did not yet have a full-time job. However, by the time WRIT 120 began, I was severely struggling to balance my schoolwork and professional work while entering the peak of my anxiety. My routine, which normally helped me to stay on top of my schoolwork, was disrupted by moving cities and receiving new responsibilities. Although my writing skills adequately carried me through my politics courses, I decided to take WRIT 120 because I needed to improve my writing skills. My reasoning for taking the class became a source of procrastination, as I felt intimidated by the possibility of producing poor writing and felt more comfortable in my other, more familiar courses and professional work. Additionally, WRIT 120 lasted only six weeks, meaning there were many more tightly packed deadlines, which I had difficulty keeping track of. Ultimately, I spiralled in this course and felt utterly out of my depth. It became a constant source of added anxiety, which my ADHD caused me to jump between unconsciously avoiding and desperately trying to repair.
Ultimately, I feel that my performance in WRIT 120 is not a reflection of my true academic abilities but of a set of circumstances beyond my control that worsened my mental health. Since completing the course, I have created a new daily routine that significantly reduces the negative effects of my ADHD by minimizing uncertainty and distractions. I have also begun seeking therapy, as I need to avoid the unmanageable mental spiral I faced this past summer.